Know Your Stars: Ridonculous Race Edition
by UltimateWarriorFan4Ever
Summary: Everyone's favorite evil Know Your Stars announcer from "All That" is back, and this time, he decides to torture all of your favorite contestants from the Ridonculous Race! You'll laugh, you'll cry, you might break a little something! Those 36 contestants from all 18 teams will never know what hit them! Next up: Noah!
1. Chapter 1: Devin

**"Know Your Stars: Ridonculous Race Edition"  
**

 **Rated T**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with Total Drama, The Ridonculous Race or any of the characters from the show. Nor do I own All That or it's famous skit, Know Your Stars. You may recognize that I've already done a parody of Know Your Stars based Total Drama. But this time, it's gonna be different since it's gonna involve me trashing contestants from the new Total Drama spinoff, The Ridonculous Race! You'll laugh, you'll cry, you might even lose a little something on your way. Regardless, enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Devin  
**

* * *

Devin was sitting on a chair inside a studio with bright lights. Suddenly, he heard the announcer do his intro. **  
**

 _ **Know your stars... Know your stars... Know your stars... Know your stars! Devin... he doesn't have a goatee. He actually drew his chin with a marker so people can think he actually has a goatee.  
**_

"Um, I'm pretty sure my goatee is real." Devin chuckled. "Sure it looks a little scribbly, but that doesn't mean I drew on it! I'm telling ya, it's real."

 _ **Devin... doesn't know that Carrie hates him!**_

"What? That's not true!" Devin exclaimed. "Me and Carrie have been best friends since we were four. Sure, we may fight a little sometimes, but I'd never hate her! Please don't make any false information here!"

Really? Because I'm very certain Carrie does hate you. I even got a tape recorder that says so! Here!

Suddenly, the announcer brought a tape recorder and pressed play. On the tape, Devin had heard Carrie's voice, but with different sound bytes:

 _ **"I. Hey. DEVIN!"**_

Devin was in total shock. The very same girl who harbored a crush around him had now harbored deep hatred for him.

"Is this true?" Devin gasped. "Was my friendship with Carrie a whole lie this time? Why didn't I see it coming? Was it because I knew she loved me all along and I didn't know it? I'm the worst horrible friend ever! Whhhhhhhhhhhhy!?

Just like that, Devin went down on his knees and cried, relishing the thought that he had now lost the best friend in the world.

 _ **Devin...**_

"What is it, now?!" Devin cried out. "Can't you see I'm grieving here!?"

 _ **Gotcha!**_

Right there, Devin stopped crying in a stunned expression. He couldn't believe he was played like that. In response, Devin's expression went from sad to angry in a matter of time. _ **  
**_

"What?!" Devin gasped. "You mean to tell me I've been played the entire time?!"

 _ **Hehehehe... hurts doesn't it, crybaby?**_

"Not as much as I'm gonna hurt you for making me think that Carrie hated me!" Devin's teeth gritted.

 _ **Settle down, little baby. You want your binkie and blanky?**_

"Okay, that's does it!" Devin exclaimed with rage. "You and me and going at it right now!"

Now you know Devin, the crybaby with a drawn goatee!

"I don't think so!" Devin exclaimed as the camera backed away. "And where do you think you're going? We're not done yet! I still have to kick your ass from all of those lies you told! And I'm pretty sure Carrie doesn't hate me. She said 'hey', not 'hate'! What are you do, trying to confuse everyone with your grammar problems? And this goatee is not drawn on! Aren't you listening to me? Hello?!

* * *

 **Yeah, I can tell this is gonna be fun!**

 **Anyway, which contestant do you think should be next after Devin?**

 **Make sure to leave a feedback if you can! Until next time, this is UltimateWarriorFan4Ever signing off for now! Cheers!**


	2. Chapter 2: Noah

**"Know Your Stars: Ridonculous Race Edition"  
**

 **Rated T**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with Total Drama, The Ridonculous Race or any of the characters from the show. Nor do I own All That or it's famous skit, Know Your Stars. You may recognize that I've already done a parody of Know Your Stars based Total Drama. But this time, it's gonna be different since it's gonna involve me trashing contestants from the new Total Drama spinoff, The Ridonculous Race! You'll laugh, you'll cry, you might even lose a little something on your way. Regardless, enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter 2: Noah  
**

* * *

Noah sat on a chair inside the lit studio as the announcer introduced him. **  
**

 _ **Know your stars... Know your stars... Know your stars... Know your stars! Noah... has a big head.  
**_

"Duh, everyone knows that for sure, genius." Noah groaned. "Just because I have a big head, that doesn't mean you have to make fun of me."

 _ **Noah... has a total crush on Emma.  
**_

Suddenly, Noah blushed as a result.

"Oh, come on, that is definitely not true!" Noah exclaimed. "I happen to think that me and Emma are just respectable competitors, and not lovebirds. Besides, if I ever had a crush on her, I would send her letters, sing love songs to her, and even send her chocolates! But that's not me, so no way."

 _ **Is that why you're blushing?  
**_

"Ummm, no!" Noah exclaimed, even though he didn't want to admit his crush on air. "It's just hot in here! Can't we get on to something else?"

 _ **Noah... put Emma in the hospital trying to kiss her, only to have his big head crush her skull on the way down.  
**_

"Okay, that is SO not true!" Noah exclaimed, getting a little miffed. "I don't even remember kissing her or hurting her! And if you're asking, yes, she's in the hospital! My stupid friend Owen accidentally gave her a concussion after he fell on her. We were asked to repair the roof to their house and that's what happened! Don't give out any ideas."

 _ **Noah and Emma, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G!  
**_

"How about I give you a B-E-A-T-I-N-G instead?" Noah raised his eyebrow. "I don't know why you think we have a crush on each other, but we don't! And if you keep these lies about me and Emma up, I will find you and kick your butt. Trust me!" _ **  
**_

 ** _Now you know Noah, the big-headed loser who thinks he doesn't have a crush on Emma, but he actually does!_  
**

"No. No you don't." Noah growled.

 _ **Be sure you and Emma send me a postcard of your honeymoon together!**_

"Eh no, it's not happening!" Noah scowled, before the camera backed away from him. "What does this have to do with Emma? Not that I don't have a crush on her, nor do I wanna marry her! I still don't get why you're bring her name up around me! And just for the record, my head is like this because I have a big brain! I'm not like the kid from "Mask", you know? Can you understand that? Hello?!

* * *

 **If you asking me fans, I do ship Noah/Emma. I think it's about damn time that Noah finally got off the market for sure.  
**

 **Okay, who should be the next contestant after Noah?  
**

 **Feedbacks are welcome! Until next time, this is UltimateWarriorFan4Ever signing off for now! BOO-YEAH!**


	3. Chapter 3: Brody

**"Know Your Stars: Ridonculous Race Edition"  
**

 **Rated T**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with Total Drama, The Ridonculous Race or any of the characters from the show. Nor do I own All That or it's famous skit, Know Your Stars. You may recognize that I've already done a parody of Know Your Stars based Total Drama. But this time, it's gonna be different since it's gonna involve me trashing contestants from the new Total Drama spinoff, The Ridonculous Race! You'll laugh, you'll cry, you might even lose a little something on your way. Regardless, enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter 3: Brody  
**

* * *

Brody started sitting on a chair inside the lit studio while the announcer introduced him at the same time. **  
**

 _ **Know your stars... Know your stars... Know your stars... Know your stars! Brody... is best friends with a surfboard.  
**_

"Um, actually, I'm best friends with Geoff." Brody replied. "We've been best bros since childhood. He always knows a thing or two of teaching me the ropes of surfing. He's pretty awesome. Oh, and the surfboard's okay too, even know he's not actually _my_ best friend."

 _ **Brody... is the first blind contestant in Total Drama history.  
**_

"Dude, you do realize I can see right?" Brody replied again. "You see glasses on me? No, you don't. So for the record, I am not blind. We straight on that, dude?"

 _ **Brody... look up.  
**_

"Why?" Brody raised his eyebrow.

 _ **Just trust me, you're gonna like it.  
**_

With such curiosity, Brody looked up...

...

...

...only to have a light beam burn his eyes.

"AAAAGH!" Brody screamed in pain. "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT, BRO!"

 _ **You been blinded. You're definitely gonna make history with no sight at all! Way to go!**_

"Dude, this was your fault bro!" Brody exclaimed. "My eyes are frickin' burning me right now!"

 ** _Good for you!_**

"Good for me?" Brody gasped. "Dude, this is bad! You burned them right through my sockets!"

 _ **And now you know Brody, the first blind contestant from the Ridonculous Race!**_

"No, you don't, dude!" Brody angrily replied as the camera backed away from him. "I can't believe this! This is gonna take me 10 years to get my sight back! And believe me, when I do, I'm gonna find whatever house you live in and kick your ass, bra! And what makes you think a surfboard could ever be my best friend? They're objects to ride on, not things to hug! Who could ever hug a surfboard! Are you listening to me? HELLO?!"

* * *

 **Youch. I think Brody might have gotten the worst end of that one.  
**

 **Who should be the next contestant after Brody?  
**

 **Feedbacks are welcome! Until next time, this is UltimateWarriorFan4Ever signing off for now! C-YA!**


End file.
